Published on February 18th, 2014 | by Jo Borrás14
Chevron Explosion Kills, Chevron Gives Away Free Pizzas
Last week, residents of Bobtown, PA were awoken by a massive, fiery blast at the town’s Chevron-owned fracking well. The explosion is believed to have killed at least one person, with another worker injured and a number of area residents seriously, rightfully frightened by the blast. Chevron knew it had to do something, but what could possibly alleviate the fears of Bobtown residents and show that Chevron felt the full weight and import of the loss of their worker’s life?
Why- free pizza, of course!
Now, I’m usually the first one to point out how awful the crooked, lying, fear-mongering, price-gouging oil and gas companies are. Still- and I’m being honest- I thought this was a hoax. There is no way a company that claims to hire
intelligent live humans could be so monumentally stupid, I thought. Until I saw this …
… which, yeah. That looks an awful lot like a gift certificate for a pizza- and if that’s not proof that the oil and gas companies are peopled by s***-eating monsters who should be hanged on principle, I honestly don’t know what is. Even more than
bribing conning the Brazilian gov’t into taking $42 million instead of the $17.5 billion it was (successfully) sued for, I think. You can make the argument that it’s good Chevron chose a local brand or deride them for not giving out a brand-name pizza coupon on your own time.